Bree and Bauer’s Blog

Today started a new phase in my mommy/UTA employee split personalities.  We crossed over a proverbial bridge so to speak…

The kids started at a new school and I started my new hours at work. The kids will now go to school 3 full days a week and i will work two full days and a half.  The other half will be spend doing mommy chores so that my time with the kids can be “all about them”.

Ever since Bree came into my world almost 3 and a half years ago, I’ve been trying to find the “perfect” solution for her care.  I’ve struggled with working full time and then was lucky enough to go part-time.  She was in full time church daycare, then an in-home daycare, then Mothers’ Day Out, and numerous babysitters in between.  Bauer came into the mix as well and adding kids only adds pressure to figure it all out.  It also adds expense.

I’ve worried about spending more than I make on finding them suitable daycare while I’m at work part-time, I’ve struggled with using a Mothers’ Day Out for daycare knowing it may not be providing the level of care I hope for, I’ve wondered why I work so hard at trying to work and could I give it all up and just stay home.

These verses run through my head all the time…I play out scenario after scenario with what might just be the “perfect” solution.  I feel like I have no choice to keep trying to make things better…these faces deserve the very best…

Summer has always been (and I foresee to always be) a hard time to find childcare unless you are in all year daycare program.  So midway through last Spring I started worrying about the summer.  Although I work in education, i do not get summers off and this comes as a surprise to many.  I work my same hours (albeit a lot less nights and weekends) in the summer.

I was feeling a little restless with the kids’ current Mothers’ Day Out program for numerous reasons and started looking elsewhere for child care this past February.

A year round church daycare was recommended to me from a women in my Moms’ Group as accommodating part-time students.  I had a good feeling that this may be our new home.  She highly recommended the program.

In less than a week we took a tour, felt good about it, Bree approved the playground and we were off signing them up.  Bauer got one of the last spots in the almost “2″s class and I was feeling blessed beyond measure.

I’ve been building up this new school in my mind for the past 3 months.  I’ve been counting down the days until I don’t have to come up with one more plan B when I have to stay late at work or find babysitters for the many days that Mothers’ Day Out was not open for.  I was doing a happy dance knowing that summers would be off my worry radar for at least the next couple years.

This school is more expensive…about double what we were paying at Mothers’ Day Out (this tells you what a good “deal” we were getting at MDO).  It has been a big decision to follow through on and we will cut back in other areas.  But with that cost comes some high expectations I didn’t realize I had until today.

Both Sean and I took the kids for their first day of school.  They were looking good….fresh haircuts done by yours truly, freshly bathed, new lunch boxes, and for Bauer a new nap-map with Thomas the train all over it.  I told you I had very high expectations going into today.

Can you sense the excitement…

Kids need a lot of stuff to go to preschool…seriously ridiculous….

This really seemed to be a smile when I took the picture!  Oh Bree!

The initial steps into the new school were fabulous.  Bree immediately noticed that her new class was out on the playground.  I mean who doesn’t need a good 8am run around the slide.  As Sean took Bauer to his new classroom (he walked in like a pro once he saw a Thomas train), I felt like I had hit the jackpot.  Her class is on the playground…this might be the easiest drop-off of my life.  Everytime I have one of those thoughts, I am quickly put in my place by this child.

We had an epic meltdown…we had holding onto my leg, my neck, running away from the playground, loud, painful, crocodile tears that made everyone turn and look.  She wanted nothing to do with this whole new school thing.

I did what a parent is supposed to do…said some encouraging words, gave hugs and left the teacher to handle the meltdown.

It made me sad.  My Bree is not scared of anyone or anything and so this meltdown caught me off guard.

I also didn’t immediately feel the nurturing effects of this new preschool teacher.  I didn’t leave knowing that she would be okay.  That made me very sad.  But I also had to check my feelings because maybe I was just having some 1st day jitters as well.

I called at lunch to check on her and the director said she was having a good time in the classroom now.  Okay, back to feeling so blessed with this change.

Then I went to pick up my munchkins and again got that uneasy feeling in regards to the teachers.  I didn’t feel like they said any of the right things….or knew any of the answers to my pretty routine questions.  Did my child nap?  Did my child eat?  Did my child pee in the potty?  Was my child happy?

Bree and Bauer both were exhausted which is pretty normal…it was a long day of transition.  Mommy is tired too.  I haven’t worked a full day in a long time….lol!

Tomorrow is day 2…I hope the jitters stay away.  I just want this to be a good environment….3 out of 5 weekdays they will call this home.

I think we will all be okay.  I just need to stop the scenarios from running in my head again.  I’ve got to give this a chance.  Change is hard for everyone.  Most of all, on the Mommy.

I’m not sure I’ve blogged about my daughter’s love of dresses yet.  What started as an innocent enjoyment has become an everyday must.  We wear dresses everyday whether we are going anywhere or not.  It is either pajamas or dresses.  Now, don’t think that I find this strange for most girls.  A lot of little girls love dresses.  I just think its a little strange for mine.  Bree may not admit it, but she is a tomboy through and through.  But she is a tomboy that loves to be called “princess” by her daddy.  I think she associates dresses and princesses and her daddy…and that combination has led to shorts and t-shirts being unacceptable.  Dresses or bust so to speak.

I probably have a million pics of Bree in dresses but I caught a couple this week that just make me laugh!

Who says you can’t roller-skate in a dress…with your purse no less.

The next picture is much more sentimental than funny, but we must discuss the multiple meltdowns we have faced due to me not letting her wear this dress before yesterday.  That makes it a little more laughable to me.  Back almost 6 years ago, both my nieces were flowergirls in Sean and I’s wedding.  My sister passed down one of the dresses to Bree with a bunch of clothes.  The dress has been in Bree’s closet for months and she has asked probably everyday for the past few weeks if she could wear it.  I tried to explain that it was a fancy dress and that we didn’t wear fancy dresses to play in the backyard.  We only wear fancy dresses to parties or to church.  There were meltdowns but also acceptance of this theory.

Yesterday before I left for work, I told Bree that we would be going to a party that night.  It was a baby gender revelation party for one of my best friends that is having twins.  You were supposed to wear blue if you thought the twins would be boys and pink if you thought they would be girls.  I’m not sure Bree understood the two opposing colors, but she heard “party” and though immediately of her “party dress”.  It was a really casual gathering of just intimate family and friends, but that was our deal and I let her wear the dress.  She looked like a princess for sure.  Or a little girl ready to be a flower girl in a wedding.  I can’t believe I have a little girl that is big enough to wear the flower girl dress worn at my wedding.  Surreal to say the least.

Oh my sweet dress loving girl!

We like many other Americans kicked off the summer season (Memorial Day weekend) by heading to the lake….Lake Kiowa that is!  We had to get back in the groove after a few months off from lake fun.

We remastered sand castle building…

We remastered chillin’ on the beach…

We remastered looking good in our bathing suits…or at least pretending…

We remastered riding on the sea doo….

with both kiddos…

We remastered boat riding…

And boat jumping…

We remastered enjoying a beautiful sunset…

And most of all we were so thankful for having a family that might be one year older, but never has to remaster how to have fun together!

Looking forward to a great summer of more Kiowa memories to come!

I got some unintended perspective this weekend.  It’s amazing what a few hours (not consecutive, mind you) of reading will do for one’s mind.

I’m used to reading books that involve a pig, a farm, some numbers or letters and a great moral of the story.  I rarely get through all the pages before my audience leaves.  I normally finish it up just for my own satisfaction before moving onto the next thing.  This is life with kids…and I do love it.

But I also love to read for myself.  Normally late nights and long weekends are the only time that this can happen, but luckily I read fast so I can normally still read a fair amount during the year.

Currently I am reading Laura Bush’s new book, Spoken from the Heart. I downloaded it to my Kindle after seeing her on Oprah and really becoming curious about how the last 8 years in Washington unfolded through a wife, mother and first lady’s eyes.  It is truly fascinating.

But my unintended perspective, besides realizing the depth of respect for George W. and the bigger Bush family I have is way deeper than I ever realized, came from the many stories that Laura tells about her travels to other parts of the world and her work with the women in these countries.

I consider myself a well educated person (we can debate this another time).  I have a bachelors and masters degree.  I feel as though I watch the news, I read Time magazine, and try to research current issues so I can form an opinion.  But like most of my circle of friends and family, I get caught up in my bubble.  The bubble where a meltdown of a child or a conflict in a family schedule is the most pressing matter at hand.  When will I get a workout in and what will I make for dinner are typically my most urgent daily questions.  I love my bubble.  But its far from reality for most of the world.

Ever since I have gotten pregnant, lots of people have asked if we will find out the gender.  “You already have a boy and a girl so I guess it really doesn’t matter”…seems to be the mindset of most.  And yes, they are right.  It does not matter in the least.  I joke that whatever kid is behaving better that week makes me want that gender, but at the end of the day, I just want them to be healthy.  Now that my sonogram to find out the gender is only two weeks away, I find my mind drifting to the last spot in our Murphy clan…boy or girl…and what the implications will be.

While I was reading this weekend, my mind drifted to this question again.  To most of America, to have a girl or a boy will mean just a few things.  Pink verses blue, bows verses baseball caps, dance verses football, to have a sister or a brother to play with, etc.

To most of the world; however, the question of girl verses boy means a life of oppression and fear or a life of fighting for that child.  I doubt very much that in those societies mothers-to-be get to celebrate the life growing within them very much at all.  I can’t imagine bringing a little girl into the world and knowing that they will never get a chance to have any freedom at all or that my little boy will be forced to fight from the minute he can walk.  And it makes me so sad.

While America may not have it all figured out and we have had to fight for many of the freedoms that exist, there is vast opportunity for everyone.  I never look at my children and hope that they survive a brutal attack by a neighboring village or hope that they won’t contract HIV/AIDS like half the population of my country.  I never have to pray that my little girl gets to go to school someday and my little boy will not be forced to join the country’s army.  I get to teach them things slowly.  I get to let them be kids that play with trains and play-dough and learn slowly about what it is to be a citizen in this world.  I get to instill dreams the size of the universe in their little minds.

Being a mom is hard most days, yes, but on this Memorial Day of all days, I am so thankful for our freedom. Not for myself anymore, but for my children and the children of all of my generation.  We need to all find perspective in the daily game we face because the games of so many moms in other countries are not even something we can or want to even imagine.

Laura has inspired me to try and find ways I can help women all over the world.  Don’t worry because I’m not going to sell everything and take my kids on mission trips to Africa (yet!), but I do think teaching my kids from an early age how different things are in other countries is a great start.  I intend to keep learning and I hope each of you find a way to do the same!

And as for the boy or girl question…I’m hoping God is sending me a child who has compassion outside of our bubble and will help to make a world where boys and girls in every country can know what freedom really means.  But I still plan to find out the gender of said kid in a couple weeks!

Happy Memorial Day everyone!  And thanks to all those who serve to keep our country free!

Some people say that kids take all the spontaneity out of your life.

Don’t tell us Murphys that!

We just got home from a impromptu vacation in Plano at Grammy’s.

It all started with an innocent play date with two of our favorites Katy and Meg at Going Bonkers.  It was such a fun time.

The play date ended right as naptime was supposed to start.  We were way closer to Grammy’s house than ours so I made a little phone call and asked if we could come snooze in Plano.

Bauer snoozed right away and Bree waited a couple of hours, but good naps were had by all.  In order to get Bree to take this delayed nap, there may have been some promise of staying for dinner at Grammy’s and perhaps an swim at Grammy’s pool.  Shameless bribing at its best.  And it worked.

So I made good on my promises slowly but surely.  We ate some great Jason’s Deli and had an impromptu trip to the park before it was bedtime.

Then I made an trip to Target for some provisions for our impending sleepover!  New pjs, a swimsuit for Bree and some breakfast food make for an even more fun stay at Grammys!

We woke up this morning and as promised (although postponed), Bree and I went swimming.

After a morning swim and a few errands to secure a new couple Thomas trains for Bauer, we lunched at Chili’s.  There was coloring and train driving while we waited for our yummy meal.

We napped again after lunch and played some more with our favorite toys.  After a scrumptious hot dog dinner, we finished up with push pops and car rides outside in the courtyard.

The stickiness from the push pops was the last bit of dirt this mom could handle.  I threw them in the bath before we headed home.  The vacation had to end due to our lack of clean anything to put on.  Oh and I have to work tomorrow…boo!

B & B went home in style…birthday suit style (with a diaper or two)!

What a fun 48 hours…thanks Grammy for such a spontaneously crazy time!

We did it.  We made it through our first year of dance!  Bree has grown so much since she started in September.  It’s really amazing to see how far she has come and how much she seems to really love dancing and mostly how much she loves to be on stage!

She performed in her first recital this past weekend.  It was quite an event but amazingly she never got overwhelmed or said she didn’t want to do it.  She was so excited to show off her stuff for her cousins, Grammy and Granddad, and Aunt Jennifer.

The song was an oldie but a goodie: “The Good Ship Lollipop”.

Their costumes were the cutest of the recital…

One of the reasons I love her dance studio…everything is based in Christ…a little prayer to start us off!

Luckily Bree’s routine was number 4 of the show…she’s on the left!

The final pose was the lollipop over their head…this was one of the parts Bree never forgot!

Bree’s fan club!

Post performance…with the lollipop!  She fell walking off the stage and thus we are not really in the mood for pictures.

Feeling better with her favorite cousins!

An attempt at a pic with Grammy…she was more interested in laying in her lap!

After a trips to Braum’s to celebrate…Bree was spent.

What a great event to share with our family!

We watched the video of her performance yesterday on a DVD Sean made and Bree had a meltdown because she was ready to go back to “her stage” and perform again in her costume.  She didn’t want to watch it, she wanted to relive it again and again.  That has to mean she’s into this activity…right??!  I haven’t signed her up for the Fall yet, but I’m thinking I will.  It was such a fun adventure for both of us!

And that costume….worth every penny!  Adorable doesn’t even begin to express it!

It’s finally done.  I can hear the waves crashing (oh maybe that’s Bree throwing things off the top bunk) and feel the salty wind in my hair (oh maybe that’s just the fan being on top speed and the fact that I haven’t showered yet today).  The beach has landed in Arlington…specifically on “Beachside Dr.”

Oh my wittiness knows no bounds!

So we are having another baby…or so I’m told.   This put us in quite a predicament with our kid room situation.  We have a four bedroom house but when you have a Master for the grown-ups and then a home office for your hubby, it only leaves two up for grabs.  As of a few weeks ago, we had the very girly lavender princess room for Bree and the cute somewhat gender neutral green animal nursery for Bauer.

As most families with two kids (a boy and a girl) would agree, it was perfect.  Everyone had their own space and all was right in the world.  Then we procreated again.  Yes, we know how it happens!  And even though I’ve blocked most of the first year of both Bree and Bauer out of my memory bank, I seem to remember that babies sleep a lot and not always on the most consistent schedule.  They also scream a lot..oh and that waking up in the middle of the night thing.  That’s one of my favorites.

So we started to weigh our options: A) Have baby bunk with mom and dad…this gave me nightmares of losing any and all of the little privacy I have left, B) find out the gender of baby b and have baby bunk with like gendered sibling…this gave me nightmares of no one in our house ever sleeping again, C) have baby bunk in Sean’s home office…hahahahaha, D) put Bree and Bauer together for the time being and keep the current nursery well, current.

You can tell I spent weeks thinking about this…well, that and the minivan!

We finally agreed that option D was really the only option and while I’m still not convinced it is going to work…cue nightmares of Bree and Bauer screaming about “he touched me” and “she’s looking at me” all night long…I decided to just throw caution to the wind and just think about how to decorate instead.

So then began my long deliberations about what was a gender neutral theme for two toddlers.

There were an amazing amount of ideas on the good ole internet….AMAZING!

I found one nursery theme that was a very simple beach theme.  I began to put together Bree’s love for the water, the “beach” that we have at the lakehouse, and really everything outdoors.  I ran the idea past her since I thought there would be huge meltdowns about losing her purple room.  She loved it.  She talked about it for weeks leading up to when Sean and I finally painted.  I was feeling success on the horizon.

In the course of a week, we picked a paint color, ordered bunk beds, bought mattresses and I scoured every craft store in the Arlington area looking for all things beach.  I picked an ideal time of year to begin this search…

The results are below.  And Bree is in love.  Bauer loves the room, but loves his crib more.  We keep telling ourselves we have 5 more months to work on that little detail.  We now call the rooms “The Beach Room” and “The Animal Room” as we are trying to phase out Bree and Bauer’s room nostalgia.

We hope that by the time the baby comes there will be no foreseeable connection to his/her arrival and the fact that B & B now share a room.  Wishful thinking I realize!

Enjoy!  Oh and Sean enjoyed the fact that I got almost everything on sale, from Craigslist, or from my favorite store, Target!  I’m such a bargain hunter when I want to be!

Welcome…door sign!

The adorable bunkbeds!

The built-in shelves.

The reading/laying out area…

Bree’s bunk!

Bauer’s bunk.

I’m in love with this lamp!

Close-up of some of the shelf decorations:

A craigslist steal…pottery barn rug for $30…UNREAL!  The kids like to jump into it and say “Splash!”

Our favorite prayers for our girl and boy!

And a few of our happiest beach bums!

Come on over for a swim and some sun!  There’s a trundle if you need to stay over!